#990 The seconds between connecting to the internet and it actually working

We're all familiar with this, but you may not realize that this actually does slightly annoy you. You turn on your Mac's airport or turn on your inferior PC's internet port. You immediately go to any website (facebook) to see if it's working and this, or something similar to this, is the all-too-familiar screen that appears.

Ugh. No need to panic, not that you ever do; you've been here a million times. You're just not connected to the internet yet. You know the drill. Refresh. Nothing. Refresh. Nothing. Refresh, refresh, refresh, nothing. Refresh, nothing. Refresh, bingo, connected. Some of you will go with the bookmark strategy, where you just click different easily accessible bookmarks until one works, signifying a succesful connection to the internet. Others will go with the repetition strategy, which consists of leaving your cursor in the url bar up top, and going through the click-enter repetition. All are different, acceptable strategies of refreshing the internet for the seconds between connecting to the internet and it actually working.

It's amazing how many times you can refresh a page in less than 10 seconds. But you know what? Those 10 seconds are 10 seconds of your life that you'll never get back. Come on internet gods, you're better than that.

It's just slightly annoying.

#991 Slow drivers in the left lane

If you're guilty of this, it's okay, it's not your fault that you're from New Jersey (and thus a terrible driver) or 70+ years of age. For the rest of us traffic-rule-savy drivers, we're just slightly annoyed at your driving antics. Those "slower traffic keep right" signs are there for a reason.

The only reason that this isn't on the "1000 unbelievably annoying things" list is because you can pass these ignorant fools on the right. It goes almost without saying what you do when you finally manage to pass these drivers on the right, but for the sake of the list, it should be said. As you pass these stubborn drivers who wouldn't move to the right lane under any circumstance (i.e. backing traffic up half a mile or dealing with someone riding on their bumper), you and your car full of people give them the "are you kidding me right now?" stare.

Standard protocol for this stare should be followed: make sure everyone in the car is staring (including the driver), make sure it's not a casual stare (they need to know they did something wrong, so staring into their soul would suffice), and make sure you continue the stare in your mirror (for a few moments) after you get in front of them in the left lane. This should satisfy your confidence and ego without causing any real damage to anyone. Use your own judgment when deciding if you want to throw any expletives or gestures in their direction, but keep in mind, as said before, they may be from New Jersey or may be too old to be on the road.

It's just slightly annoying.

#992 Getting stuck with a Q at the end of a scrabble game

10 points is a whole lot of points in Scrabble. And can you imagine getting it on a triple letter? Crazy! Q-words are some valuable commodities on the scrabble board, that's for sure. Quit, quilt, quick, quiet, quite, all winners. The Q letter should always be sought after in the beginning and middle of the game; getting a good Q word is a winning strategy, as long as you obtain the letter when all four U's are still out and about waiting to be paired with their long lost Q mate.

What's slightly annoying is when you finally do get the sought after Q and notice all 4 U's are out on the board. Okay, okay, not the end of the world, just trade it for a mystery letter in the bag and let someone else deal with it.....what do you mean there's no letters left? Uh oh.

So you're stuck in a slightly annoying situation. The U's are all out or in other player's racks, and it's already come down to the two letter moves of "it, an, of" and the other classic last-round Scrabble moves. Let's face it, you're gonna either have to take the 10 point hit on that Q or you're gonna have to break out the illegal google-search for weird words like QI (which, by the way, is a vital force in Chinese thought according to the online scrabble dictionary).

Who's stupid idea was it to make a letter that required another letter next to it anyway?

It's just slightly annoying.

#993 When hangers get tangled in each other

This really shouldn't be a bothersome, but we all know that this is at least slightly annoying. When two hangers get tangled up, it becomes more complicated than trying to figure out the point of cleaning up before the cleaning lady comes. 


You know who I bet doesn't have this problem? Those magicians that connect two metal rings and then disconnect them...with magic.

Am I the only one that considers throwing the hangers out when they're tangled up?

It's just slightly annoying.

#994 When you have to leave as your favorite part of a movie is coming on

It's 9:45 and you're sitting on the couch or lying in bed, well aware that you need to leave at 10:00. You peruse through the televisions channels, looking for literally anything that will fill the 15 minute void.

Well, well, well. Look what you stumbled upon. It's the final fight of Gladiator. It's the Catalina wine mixer in Step Brothers. It's the Titanic's first strike against the iceberg. It just happens to be the favorite part of one of your favorite movies. You're briefly excited for a moment, but glancing at the clock, excitement becomes replaced by slight annoyance. It's 9:58. Sorry buddy, that twist at the end of Usual Suspects will have to wait until next time. Hours later, you may realize that you feel annoyed for no reason whatsoever. Well, maybe if you had caught Heath Ledger serenading Julia Stiles in 10 Things I Hate About You, you'd feel a little better tempered.

Heath Ledger Singing "cant Take My Eyes off You" - Funny bloopers are a click away

It's just slightly annoying.

#995 Really tight rollercoaster safety bars

Safety first. Especially on rollercoasters. I think it's safe to say that we're all beyond grateful that amusement parks stress safety on their rides. On rollercoasters, there's a great protocol. We strap ourselves in, bring down the saftey bar in front of us and get comfortable. You lean to your side to look at all the people and carts in front of you. You take comfort in seeing someone coming down the line, leaning over and checking everyone's saftey bar to make sure everything is functioning correctly.

Clunk. Safe. Clunk. Safe. Clunk. Safe. As you hear the clunk of the bars being pushed down onto the riders in front of you, you are reassured that everyone's cart has been safe so far. Now the worker, a teenage college kid working here as a summer job, has arrived at your cart.


As he pushes down on the bar to make sure it's safe and tight enough, the reassuring "clunk" becomes a slightly annoying "crush." This safety bar is beyond safe. This safety bar has stolen all comfortableness as well as all mobility in your legs and feelings in your genitals. This is like getting a bear hug around your waist. This is like wearing your 10-year-old sister's jeans. This is more uncomfortable than Santa Clause probably felt when you thought it would be funny to sit on the old man's lap when you were 17.  Don't worry about those bones that the bar is crushing, you don't need bones to enjoy the ride......"dispatch."

It's just slightly annoying.

#996 Tuesdays

People may say that Mondays are the worst, but that's just not true. Mondays are when you get to see people you haven't seen all weekend and share stories of all of the shenanigans you pulled over the weekend. Wednesdays aren't terrible either. Halfway through the week, and every day that passes is one day closer to the weekend.

Tuesdays, however, are just not a good day. Tuesday has absolutely no significance in the course of a week. In fact, in the history of man kind, the only good Tuesdays were probably all of those Tuesdays with Morrie. I motion to have Tuesdays removed from the calendar, who's with me?

It's just slightly annoying.

#997 Waking up minutes before your alarm goes off

It's bad enough having to wake up to the sound of an alarm. Unless your alarm is the sound of baby's laughter or a puppy being rescued from a burning building, you're not looking forward to the sound of that alarm. It's a necessary evil that keeps the world running the way it should. What could be more annoying than waking up abruptly to the sound of an alarm? Well, we all know the answer to that. Waking up just minutes before your alarm is slightly annoying.

Sleepily, you look up at a clock that's too bright for your half-closed eyes. Ugh, 7:53. Sure you can sleep for those last seven minutes, but you know what that feels like. You'll close your eyes for what feels like one second and all of the sudden, it's not 7:53:01, its 8:00 and it's time to get up. You could go the other route and try to stay awake, gradually waking up for the next seven minutes. But your eyelids...they're...just...so...heavy. Wake up, it's 8:00 already!


It's just slightly annoying.

#998 Wet socks

There's a million ways to get stuck in this slightly annoying predicament here. However, when it comes down to it, there is only one way to solve the problem and that solution is to peel off your freshly ruined socks.

But let's be realistic here, you can't just take off your socks whenever and wherever you want. According to social norms, it's not acceptable to take off your shoes and socks whenever the need strikes you; it's like masturbating on an airplane, it's just frowned upon. If it were deemed "normal," we'd see slightly annoyed people in all sorts of places taking off their shoes and socks just to put on their now dampened shoes all over again. Busses, offices, sidewalks and dry spots on the ground would become safe havens for everyone's woeful feet. Instead of finding any sort of safe haven, we often just walk around with that familiar squish of water sopping in and out of our socks, just enough to ruin and smell up the shoes we actually care about. Even after we finally get those grimy socks off, are we rewarded? Rarely. We now face the problem of smelly feet, smelly shoes, blisters from sockless shoe-wearing, and probably a few STDs.

It's just slightly annoying.

#999 School Zones

Don't get me wrong here, I respect and appreciate the concept of a school zone. I really do. What I don't appreciate is your fourth grader walking faster than my car. Maybe I'll be less than slightly annoyed when I have a child, but until then, I will always be a little bit agitated that I need to tack on an extra four minutes to my trip to drive through a half-mile 15 mph school zone.

It's just slightly annoying.

#1000 When you get the Doritos residue on your shirt

Doritos are awesome. So is licking off the cheesy residue that sticks to your fingers. It's like a bonus for eating Doritos. It's like the Doritos company is saying, "great job finishing our bag of Doritos, but wait, there's more!" Where else can you get such a reward?

Not so awesome is when you forget your fingers are covered in this cheesy residue. You do the classic shirt rub-off that you do when you eat every other crumby food. It's normally a great feeling, cleaning your hands of those harmless crumbs with just one swipe on the shirt.

It's a slightly annoyed feeling, however, that you experience when you forget that these aren't just any ordinary crumbs. No, these are special crumbs that are out to get you if you neglect them. And even worse is the fact that it's always the second after you do your shirt rub-off that you've realized your fatal mistake. Cheesy fingers? More like cheesy shirt now. Don't worry, at least that smudge on your nice shirt isn't bright orange or anything.

It's just slightly annoying.