#947 Being unable to untie a knot that you tied

On second thought, maybe you shouldn't have tied that shoelace so tight. Hopefully no one will know that you're the one that got yourself into this predicament. Way to go Einstein.

It's just slightly annoying.

#948 When a lemon seed falls to the bottom of your drink

When a lemon seeds falls to the bottom of your drink, it's not only slightly annoying, but it's also slightly dangerous. We have to sip our drink in the constant fear that the lemon seed is going to zip up through the straw, get lodged in our throat and kill us. Don't act like that's not crossing your mind when you see that seed falling gracefully and slowly to the bottom of your glass. I, for one, would rather not sip my drink in constant fear.

Luckily, there's a solution to this problem. A solution that requires physics and actual skill. This solution consists of jabbing the seed with your straw, so it's stuck across the submerged end of the straw. Once you have it cornered, you can begin the extraction. To extract said lemon seed, pucker up and suck that straw fairly hard, forcing the seed to be stuck to the end of your straw, allowing you to do the suck-and-lift technique to bring it to the top. Don't get lazy as you lift up, because there's still the challenge of getting past the ice and then holding the seed there out in open air. Once you've successfully extracted the lemon seed, high fives are in order. Congratulations, you cheated death.

It's just slightly annoying.

#949 Picking up the ball while playing ping pong

Ping pong, the sport that you could play for hours on end if it weren't for having to chase or find or pick up the ball every twenty seconds. Bending over and over again to pick up the ball really takes a toll on you. Why do you think there are now ball boys at tennis matches? They clearly got fed up with the ball retrieval aspect of the sport and took action. Nicely done tennis people of the world. Now how do the rest of us simpletons go about getting a ball boy of our own for our lowly exhibition matches in our basement?

It's just slightly annoying.

#950 Cold toilet seats

Nothing wakes you up faster than
a cold toilet.

We know when the toilet seat is going to be cold. It's a a terrible apprehension for the feeling of discomfort about to come.

The cold toilet seat is the reason for the good ol' seat hover. Yeah, you know the one. It's the move where your pants are already down and you hover your naked butt a couple inches above the seat, mentally preparing. Slowly, you lower yourself with a hilarious look of discomfort on your face, and boom, we have touch down. Hang in there. Luckily, we must have some really warm bodies, and the seat is warmed up in a matter of seconds. Go human bodies, woo. The cold toilet seat must be the toilet's revenge of having us sit on it all of the time.

Touche toilet seat, touche.

It's just slightly annoying.

 ...on an unrelated note, happy thanksgiving to all of the readers celebrating tonight!

#951 Cicadas

I will admit that the sounds of these insects on a warm summer night is quite relaxing sometimes. But sometimes, all we want is the comforting noise of silence. Complete and utter silence. In this world, finding complete silence is such a rarity; when we do find complete silence though, there's truly something special about it.

Cicadas are not cool with silence, making noise at all times, in all places. For that, we cannot be cool with cicadas. What are they saying to each other for 8 hours straight through the night anyway? Hey cicada, we don't yell to our friends right outside of our houses, so why are you always doing it to us?

It's just slightly annoying.

#952 Drying off with a towel that's already wet

Of course there are many scenarios where this slight annoyance occurs, but as much as we don't want to admit it, the most common of all towel mishaps is our own fault.

Sharing towels at the beach or by the pool seems like a good idea at first. Everything is great for the lucky one to get to use the towel first. But then it's your turn. As you take the towel from your buddy, you will most likely be letting out a defeating sigh of disappointment when you realize that the towel is damp all over. Not only is it wet, but it's also cold. It's far from what you're looking for in the dry-off experience. What's that saying? Sharing is caring? Clearly, that's not always the case.

It's just slightly annoying.

#953 Getting pants off while wearing shoes

Taking off your pants (or someone else's pants) is usually a pretty simple, pretty easy and pretty awesome activity. Go ahead, take off your pants right now. Doesn't that feel good?

One man simply does
not have the time to deal
with pants shenanigans.

The answer is yes, that feels great. For those of you who have your shoes on however, you will probably find yourself in disagreement. Keeping the shoes on during the pants removal process is a guaranteed way to add a slightly annoying 3+ minutes to the process. Everything will be going so well as you slide down your pants when all of the sudden, bam, you hit your ankles, where your shoes say to your pants "no, this is as far as you go." You'll fight through the awkward stage of pulling your pants legs around shoes, one a time, thinking to yourself how stupid you were for not taking off your shoes. And that's just the best case scenario. Worst case scenario? This pants-off maneuver leads to the embarrassment of falling on your face, and let me tell you, your face is not a fan of falling on itself.
 

No pants problems here.

Snap pants should be socially acceptable for all ages and environments. I wouldn't mind seeing some snap pants around the office, or seeing the groom walk down the aisle in a solid pair of snaps.

It's just slightly annoying.

#954 When people forget their turn signal is on

Don't you people hear that ticking noise? Don't you see the blinking signal?

To those people in the left lane with their left turn signal on, or in the right lane with their right turn signal on. Oh, really? You're turning left now, off the road, into the median? Go for it.

It's just slightly annoying.

#955 Having a hole in your straw

This child would simply not have the
strength required to drink through
a broken straw.

Drinking through a straw is great. Drinking through a straw that has a hole/slit in it, not so much. The drinking experience is just not the same. Prepare to pucker those cheeks extra hard to get your delicious drink out of that cup because you're gonna work for this drink.

Sure, the solution is obvious, get a new straw. But that requires energy that you and I both know we don't want to use, especially after just using so much of it trying to suck up that drink through a damaged straw. What are we, made of energy? I think not.

It's just slightly annoying.

#956 Lines

We live in a world of instant gratification. We live in a world where you can usually get what you want fairly quickly. But somehow, we also live in a world of lines. What's up with that? 

When you get to the front of the line, you should be making an effort to move the line along. Have exact change ready, don't write checks, know what you want, don't rob the place, stay off the phone and move about your business quickly. If we avoid these time consuming ordeals, we can become a better world, like a world without lines or a world where the Dallas Cowboys have an embarrassing season, every season. Get your act together slowpokes, you're holding the world back. And no, I don't actually know what the word "slowpoke" means either.

It's just slightly annoying.

...except when this happens!

#957 Floaters

Floaters, in this context, will be defined as the leftover drinks you find after a night of partying. By the time you discover these half-empty solo cups, the beer is warm, flat and probably doesn't smell quite right. There's also more than likely a fly or two in there, getting completely hammered.

As is the same solution to most of life's problems, the best solution is to just drink. 

It's just slightly annoying.

#958 When people say "cha cha cha" while singing Happy Birthday

Happy birthday to you, cha cha cha.

Happy birthday to you, cha cha cha.

Happy birthday Dear Friend

Happy birthday to you, cha cha cha.

When Patty Hill and her sister Mildred Hill wrote this song, there was no inclusion of any slightly annoying "cha cha cha" anywhere in the lyrics. Come on man, look around, no body's laughing or even smiling when you shout the blurb "cha" three times after the real words. I wonder if Cuban musicians hate when you take the name of their most famous form of dance and music, and throw it around like it's some interchangeable interjection.

The person that is guilty of cha cha cha'ing, regardless of gender, will be known as "that guy," a title worthy of only the most awkward person in the room. Don't be that guy.

It's just slightly annoying, cha cha cha.

#959 Having a runny nose

Take that rhinorrhoea!

It's an open faucet in your nose that doesn't end. It's the source of the sniffles in a quiet room. It's the reason everyone is staring at you, slightly annoyed at the noises you've been emitting.

Although its hilarious that the scientific name of a runny nose is rhinorrhoea (citation needed), there is really nothing hilarious about it. No matter the location, situation or circumstances, rhinorrhoea is always a slight annoyance. Thank god our fingers, hands and sleeves can be used never ending tissues.

It's just slightly annoying.

#960 ATM fees

It's already bad news when you're withdrawing money from an ATM. In the perfect world, you would just wake up, find twenty dollars in your pocket, and head out to start the day...every single morning. Once you spend your pocket twenty, you'll check your other pocket and would you look at that? Another twenty!

 Until the pocket-moneymaker is created, there will always be the hassle of dealing with the withdrawal of money from ATMs. This hassle becomes a slightly annoying hassle when you get slammed with an ATM fee. After punching in your pin (to the sound of deafening beeps and boops to alert the neighborhood that you're using an ATM), you will choose the desired amount of cash, and if you're unfortunate enough to be using an ATM that doesn't belong to your bank, you'll be greeted with everyone's favorite screen. This screen prompts you with a message that goes something along the lines of:

The service provider of this terminal will charge an additional fee of $2.00 for a cash withdrawal. Are you sure you want to continue?
  
What do you think the answer is to that Mr. ATM? Yes, I'm completely okay with you stabbing me in the back after I shoot myself in the foot by agreeing to use you. That deduction should be optional. At restaurants, you get charged a certain amount, and the tip is optional. Why can't the same be true for ATMs? If an ATM refilled my drinks on a regular basis, treated me nicely, and deserved the two dollars, I would gladly give it the two bucks. I bet ATMs are laughing at us stupid humans, paying more money to lose the money we're taking out. Well guess what ATMs of the world? You're just a machine. I have opposable thumbs. Take that. And my two dollars.

It's just slightly annoying.

#961 Hitting a red light when you're already late

A red light, clearly mocking our time management skills.

Red lights suck to begin with, but that's a whole new can of worms that will be opened soon.

Hitting a red light when you're already running behind? Now that's just adding insult to injury.

It's just slightly annoying.

#962 Butt dials

A phone, clearly conniving.

Ah, the old butt dial. We get it and we give it, and either way, it's just slightly annoying. It is especially slightly annoying if one butt ends up leaving an unimportant voicemail, the double whammy that could push a slight annoyance to be a regular annoyance. Let's clear things up on the definition of butt-dialing. To do so, let's turn to the most reliable, accurate dictionary there is: the urban dictionary. Below is an abbreviated excerpt:

BUTT DIALING
When you accidentally sit on your cell phone and dial someone up and don't realize it. 

Synonyms: roll over calling, booty calling, baby-got-back calling

Urban dictionary also informs us that there is the crotch dial, the breast dial, and of course, the diaper dial. You can imagine what these definitions entail.

If only our butts can talk, then it wouldn't be slightly annoying when someone's phone happens to dial your number while in someones pocket. Butts probably hate it when you answer a butt dial because your two butts may just have wanted to have a great conversation between themselves. Quit being a conversation ruiner.

It's just slightly annoying.

#963 Unimportant voicemails

This is perhaps one of the biggest differences between older generations and younger generations. Anybody who is anybody of the younger generation knows that if you don't have something important to say when you call, there's no need to leave a voicemail. Obviously, the intended recipient of your phone call will see that they have a missed call. They will see that it's from you, what time you called and how many times you called. The missed call obviously implies that someone wanted to reach you, and you just call them back. Easy. Standard procedure.

Typical reaction after
getting a voicemail.

It's slightly annoying when someone deviates from the standard procedure.  9 out of 10 times, that deviation is a call from an older person, most likely a parent. Well, it must be urgent if they're leaving you a voicemail. Slightly annoyed, you'll dial up your voicemail, listen to the "please enter your password, then press pound" message that you've heard nine million times, punch in your password and listen to the important voicemail.

"Hey there, it's dad. It's 9:30 on Monday, just calling to see what's up. Call me back."

Great, how very important.


What's also slightly annoying is that even if you delay the inevitable of listening to that voicemail, you'll have to live with the little "new voicemail" icon on your cell phone's homescreen until you deal with it.

It's just slightly annoying.

#964 Pouring cereal into a bowl and realizing there's no milk

Worst start to a day ever.

There's nothing like a nice bowl of cereal to fulfill your hunger. There's also nothing like the let down you feel when you come to the realization that there's no milk in the fridge. If you don't want to man up and go for the ol' OJ and cereal maneuver or eat dry carbohydratey cereal, there's always the simple solution of putting the bowl of cereal back into the box. Unfortunately, the simplest solution is also the messiest solution.

Enjoying picking your Cheerios up from all over the floor, especially after you step on a few by accident.

It's just slightly annoying.

#965 Bra hooks

How many hands does it take to master the bra hook?

Sorry women of the world, you might sympathize a little less here. I don't think anyone in the world would hate the idea of women not wearing any bra at all wearing the simplest of straps. For some men, figuring out a bra hook is as impossible as figuring out where in the world Carmen San Diego is. For others, it just takes a while, more like finding Waldo. And of course, there are plenty of men who have it all figured out and there's no fumbling, stumbling and/or ripping and pulling. All in all, when it comes down to it, men have your evil devices figured out ladies.

So the bra hook has been conquered. But hear this, men (and women)! Imagine hearing the satisfying sound of velcro coming apart during your bra crusade. Let's magnetize some straps up in here. Imagine having a clap-on (or off, get it?) bra. This is the future, let's make things voice activated! Okay, okay, okay, things aren't going to go in that direction but still...

It's just slightly annoying.

#966 Static electricity shocks

All seems well as you get out of bed in the morning to start your day. You shuffle across the room, grab your door handle and ZAP. Thanks to static electricity, you are now starting your day off with a bang.

Static electricity shocks don't hurt enough to be really annoying or to be something deemed as "painful," but it's certainly something we take into account when making decisions throughout everyday life. Static shocks are intimidating enough for us to slow down considerably before touching something, to live in a constant mild fear, and to occasionally avoid contact with people. In some cases, static shocks are even intimidating enough to take innocent childrens' lunch money.

There's always that one fearless jerk who knows that when you slide out of your car, gathering static, you will be trying to avoid contact with anything and anyone at all costs. To steal this jerk's thunder, I reccomend that you go the kamikaze way and shock yourself.

To explain what static electricity is and how it is discharged, we go to Bill Nye, everyone's favorite science hero, to watch him laugh in the face of static electricity.


Still not sinking in? Jam out to The Stinky Socks in their smash hit, Static Electricity.



Sure, these videos are fun. But a static electricity shock?

It's just slightly annoying.

#967 Loud construction workers in the morning

Everyone has responsibilities. If you've got a job, you are responsible for your occupational duties. So, who assigns the duties to the construction workers that go right outside your window, turn the jackhammer on at six thirty in the morning and maintain communication with their coworkers by yelling over the already unbelievably loud, incessant cacophony?

Not pictured: you, trying to sleep in your bed, located 5 yards away.

Why can't construction workers go by the normal nine to five schedule?

It's just slightly annoying.

#968 Losing an hour of sleep during Daylight Saving Time

It's so awesome when you get to sleep a full hour more because time is turned back an hour overnight. It's so not awesome when time jumps forward and you lose a full hour of quality sleep. Is gaining that hour of sleep in the Fall worth losing that hour in the Spring? You may think differently, but I say nay. Let's take a minute to think about how stupid the invention of Daylight Saving Time is.

(This is space that should be used for thinking.)

If we never had invented this, it would just be accepted that it gets darker at a different time. Instead, time switches on us overnight and we wake up slightly annoyed on the (randomly) selected day in Spring. How can things be any more annoying? Oh wait, here's an idea. Let's make sure it's not standardized across the globe and even within countries. Check out this map, courtesy of wikipedia (which, by the way, has an unbelievably extensive page here on Daylight Saving Time, or as you kids call it, "DST").

     DST observed      DST no longer observed      DST never observed 

You stay strong orange and red.

It's just slightly annoying.